Love me now, hate me soon - Cueshe

March 12th, 2006 by ajsb

Feel sorry now our love died young
It seems too late so tell me what have i done
Is it wrong or is it right
To let you go i know you’ll be gone out of sight

Ohh, you’re the reason why i’m here
Were bound for our love
Made promises we’ll never part

Ohh, you’re the reason why i’m still here
All those sleepless nights
I know now what i want
And baby it’s you

You love me now then hate me soon
When things get rough oh why you
Blame it on the moon
Is it wrong or is it right
To let you go i know
You’ll be gone out of sight

Kingdom of Rain (part deux)

March 8th, 2006 by ajsb

Tell me what you’re thinking baby
Your heart’s beating faster than mine
And I know something’s going on in your life
In your life.. in your life

You were the girl I wanted to cry with
You were the girl I wanted to die with

And you were the boy who turned into the man
Broke my heart and let go off my hand

Our bed is empty, the fire is out
And all the love we’ve got to give has all spurted out
There’s no more blood and no more pain
In our kingdom of rain

You think you know about life
You think you know about love
But when you put your hands inside me
It doesn’t even feel like I’m being touched, and

You were the boy I wanted to cry with
You were the boy I wanted to die with

You’ve moved further from my side, year by year,
While still making love dutifully sincere

But as silent as the car lights that move across this room
As cold as our bodies silhouetted by the moon
And I would lie awake and wonder
Is it just me or this the way love is supposed to be?

Tell me what you told him baby
My heart’s beating out of time with my mind
And I know something’s going wrong in our lives

I just wanted somebody to caress, this damsel in distress
I just wanted somebody to undress, this damsel in distress
I just wanted somebody to bless, this damsel in distress
I just wanted somebody to possess, this young girl

Our bed is empty, the fire is out
And all the love we’ve got to give has all spurted out
There’s no more blood and no more pain
In our kingdom of rain

When you divorce, carry me out in your arms…

March 7th, 2006 by ajsb

This was sent to me by a friend. Really touching story.

On my wedding day, I carried my wife in my arms. The bridal car stopped in front of our one-room flat. My buddies insisted that I carry her out of the car in my arms. So I carried her into our home.

She was then plump and shy. I was a strong and happy bridegroom. This was the scene of ten years ago. The following days were as simple as a cup of pure water: we had a kid, I went into business and tried to make more money.

When the assets were steadily increasing, the affections between us seemed to ebb. She was a civil servant. Every morning we left home together and got home almost at the same time. Our kid was studying in a boarding school.

Our marriage life seemed to be enviably happy. But the calm life was more likely to be affected by unpredictable changes.

Abigail came into my life.

It was a sunny day. I stood on a spacious balcony. Abigail hugged me from behind. My heart once again was immersed in her stream of love. This was the apartment I bought for her.

Abigail said, You are the kind of man who best draws girls eyeballs. Her words suddenly reminded me of my wife. When we just married, my wife said, Men like you, once successful, will be very attractive to girls.

Thinking of this, I became somewhat hesitant. I knew I had betrayed my wife. But I couldn’t help doing so.

I moved Abigail’s hands aside and said, You go to select some furniture, O.K.? I’ve got something to do in the company.Obviously she was unhappy, because I had promised her to go and see with her. At the moment, the idea of divorce became clearer in my mind although it used to be something impossible to me.

However, I found it rather difficult to tell my wife about it. No matter how mildly I mentioned it to her, she would be deeply hurt. Honestly, she was a good wife. Every evening she was busy preparing
dinner. I was sitting in front of the TV. The dinner was ready soon.Then we watched TV together. Or, I was lounging before the computer, visualizing Abigail’s body. This was the means of my entertainment.

One day I said to her in a slight joking way, suppose we divorce, what will you do? She stared at me for a few seconds without a word. Apparently she believed that divorce was something too far away from her. I couldn’t imagine how she would react once she got to know I was serious.

When my wife went to my office, Abigail had just stepped out. Almost all the staff looked at my wife with a sympathetic eye and tried to hide something while talking with her. She seemed to have got some hint. She gently smiled at my subordinates. But I read some hurt in her eyes.

Once again, Abigail said to me, Michael, divorce her, O.K.? Then we live together. I nodded. I knew I could not hesitate anymore.

When my wife served the last dish, I held her hand. Ive got something to tell you, I said.

She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes. Suddenly I didn t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want to divorce. I raised a serious topic calmly.

She didn t seem to be much annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? I’m serious. I avoided her question. This so-called answer turned her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man!

At that night, we didn t talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer, because my heart had gone to Abigail.

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. I felt a pain in my heart. The woman who had been living ten years with me would become a stranger one day. But I could not take back what I had said.

Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release.The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer.

A late night, I came back home after entertaining my clients. I saw her writing something at the table. I fell asleep fast.

When I woke up, I found she was still there. I turned over and was asleep again. She brought up her divorce conditions: she didn’t want anything from me,but I was supposed to give her one month s time before divorce, and in the month s time we must live as normal life as possible. Her reason was simple: our son would finish his summer vacation a month later and she didn’t want him to see our marriage was broken.

She passed me the agreement she drafted, and then asked me, Michael, do you still remember how I entered our bridal room on the wedding day? This question suddenly brought back all those wonderful memories to me. I nodded and said, I remember . You carried me in your arms, she continued, so, I have a requirement, that is, you carry me out in your arms on the day when we divorce. From now to the end of this month, you must carry me out from the bedroom to the door every morning.

I accepted with a smile. I knew she missed those sweet days and wished to end her marriage with a romantic form.

I told Abigail about my wife’s divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and  thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she does, she has to face the result of divorce, she said scornfully. Her words more or less made me feel uncomfortable.

My wife and I hadn t had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. We even treated each other as a stranger. So when I carried her out for the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly, Let us start from today, dont tell our son.
I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for
bus, I drove to office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. We were so close that I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn t looked at this intimate woman
carefully for a long time. I found she was not young any more. There were some fine wrinkles on her face.

On the third day, she whispered to me, The outside garden is being demolished. Be careful when you pass there.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I seemed to feel that we were still an intimate couple and I was holding my sweetheart in my arms. The visualization of Abigail became vaguer.

On the fifth and sixth day, she kept reminding me something, such as, where she put the ironed shirts, I should be careful while cooking, etc.I nodded. The sense of intimacy was even stronger.

I didn’t tell Abigail about this.

I felt it was easier to carry her. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger. I said to her, It seems not difficult to carry you now.

She was picking her dresses. I was waiting to carry her out. She tried quite a few but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown fatter. I smiled. But I suddenly realized
that it was because she was thinner that I could carry her more easily, not because I was stronger. I knew she had buried all the bitterness in her heart. Again, I felt a sense of pain. Subconsciously
I reached out a hand to touch her head.

Our son came in at the moment. Dad, it’s time to carry mum out. He said. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had been an essential part of his life. She gestured our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face because I was afraid I would change my mind at the last minute. I held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly, as if we came back to our wedding day. But her much lighter weight made me sad.

On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. She said, Actually I hope you will hold me in your arms until we are old.

I held her tightly and said, Both you and I didn’t notice that our life was lack of such intimacy.

I jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my decision. I walked upstairs. Abigail opened the door. I said to her, Sorry, Abigail, I won’t divorce. I’m serious.

She looked at me, astonished. The she touched my forehead. You got no fever. She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Abigail, I said, I can only say sorry to you, I won’t divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn’t value the details of life, not because we didn’t love each other any more. Now I understand that since I carried her into the home, she gave birth to our child, I am supposed to hold her until I am old. So I have to say sorry to you.

Abigail seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into cry. I walked downstairs and drove to the office.

When I passed the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet for my wife which was her favorite. The salesgirl asked me to write the greeting words on the card. I smiled and wrote, I ll carry you out
every morning until we are old.

Websites developers/designers beware!

January 10th, 2006 by ajsb

I will start this blog - Website Goofs Unlimited to (un)feature websites.

hehe… hala! :P

Yahoo Mail Beta (Web 2.0)

December 15th, 2005 by ajsb

Yahoo mail beta is being rolled out as I write this. The Yahoo-Oddpost
team did a pretty good job at this webmail desktop email client
approach - drag and drop, use of keyboard’s delete button, tabbed
window for compose, preview pane just like outlook, and they changed the right-click menu too!

Yahoomail_beta

Yahoomail_beta_compose

Yahoomail_beta_right_click

My Notebook is in ICU! :(

December 13th, 2005 by ajsb

2 days after my video card at my home PC crapped out, my notebook’s hdd crashed! I’m really having a good week now. What else can go wrong!? :(

SOME IMPORTANT STUFF THAT I LOST:

- IM messages archive
- emails/ms outlook rules and filters
- files, YEAH LOTS OF EM!
- photos
- mp3s :’( waaaa!
- high-def quicktime videos :’( waaaaaa!!
- psd files
- ai files
- fla files
- html/php/asp/css/js files
- pc settings/preference
- auto forms/usernames/passwords stored in roboform! :(
- games and settings :P
- anti-virus and definitions
- gmail/msn/yahoo desktop index huge one! need to reindex again!
- ftp/sftp/scp - username/password/path info, waaaaa!!!

You know what else? I just got home and tadaaaa! I don’t know my PLDT DSL username and password! I have to go down to buy an Internet Prepaid Card. I know I have that in my Gmail somehow (Coz I’ve got tons of complaint emails to PLDT for their poor service) archived!

It’s also ironic, coz I work for UDEKO, a backup/archiving stealth startup!!! I don’t even have a backup of my own music and videos and all! :( Crap!!! :O

Oh well, time to restore everything from scratch! It really sucks!!! :(

The Web Designer and the Salesman

December 10th, 2005 by ajsb

Funny animated GIF… click on the image to start the show! :)

Designer2pe_1

Gmail has RSS!

December 9th, 2005 by ajsb

RSS is now included in Gmail! Check it out!

Gmail_rss

Efren is back! :P

December 8th, 2005 by ajsb

Yes, Efren is back! :P Bryan Singer’s new movie "Superman Returns" will be a big hit for fans of the Man of Steel. I can’t wait to see this movie… :)

Supershield_1

The new Superman logo… Cool! :)

Lexluthor1

Kevin Spacey as Lex Luthor! :)
Blackfortress1

…and Brandon Routh as Efren! err… The new Man of Steel! :D

x-men III: first look

December 7th, 2005 by ajsb

X3
The new X3 movie logo

Wolverine

Wolverine in action

Beast
1) First look at Beast

Beast2

2) First look at Beast

Angel

First look at Angel

Wolverinebeaststorm
Wolverine, Beast and Storm